Deny, Deny, Deny

“Sir, are these not your guns?”

“No, they are not.”

“Then how did they come to be in your bag?”

“I have no idea what you are talking about.”

“Is this not your bag?”

“No sir, it is not. I have never seen that bag in my life.”

“But several witnesses reported seeing you carrying it. How do account for that?”

“I do not know who these witnesses are but surely they must be mistaken.”

“Ho ho, you are a cheeky one Mr. Sir. Our forensic team, the best forensics lab East of Bethlehem, found your fingerprints on all the clips, holsters, barrels and cartridges as well as every single bullet inside said cartridges.”

“I haven’t a clue how my finger prints got there. But I would like to mention that even the best are prone to error and I forgive them for their mistake.”

“How nonchalantly you deny your deeds. There is a special place in hell for people like you. We call it prison. Do you feel nothing for poor Ms. Caroline, never to see her dear husband again?”

“I am truly sorry for her loss, but I had nothing to do with her husband’s tragic demise.”

“Liar! It was you who took his life! We have a signed confession from you and your accomplices. They sold you out!”

“I’m confused, Mr. Sir. What are you talking about?”

“Your Honour, we have a confession on paper! Hand written by the accused and signed at the bottom [He shows it round, jabbing at a scribble on the bottom and then turns back to the stand]. Is this not your ‘John Hancock’?”

“[straining his eyes] It certainly resembles my signature but I promise you, it was not written by my hand for I can I assure you that I never signed nor wrote that letter.”

“You are a liar, Mr. Sir. Our top hand writing analyst matched that hand writing to the sample you gave. A copy was found on your computer and tablet as well as previous drafts of said letter in the trash by your desk table.”

“The only reason you have that ‘sample’ is because you forced my old high school into releasing one of my old economics exam papers. I would like to point out that I did not consent to the illegal searching of my goods and property; a point that I mentioned loudly and repeatedly as they ransacked my home. I have no idea how those letters got there or how your ‘special analyst’ recognises one character from another.”

“You are a very sly man, but you surely will take the blame for the drugs.”

“What drugs?”

“Incredulous! ‘What drugs?’, he says! I speak of the Class A narcotics found in your pockets, socks and underwear of course.”

“Ah, I believe you referring tI the plant material that your officers claim to have found during the illegal strip-come-cavity search they conducted which I reminded them repeatedly was a violation of my rights as a human being.”

“Is this feeling of volition the reason that you savagely attacked both officers, as well as the first responders to the scene? Or was that just a result of reefer fuelled madness?”

“I did no such thing. I know full well that to resist or attack an officer of the law is to break the law and I am a law abiding citizen.”

“‘I don’t know what you’re talking about.’ [He snickers] ‘You violated my rights.’ is this going to be your defence for the entirety of these proceedings?”

“I don’t know, kind sir. But while we are on the topic I would like to mention that these proceedings are a violation of my rights. It is, after all, your word against mine.”

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One thought on “Deny, Deny, Deny

  1. Pingback: A1312DF: inFamous | Bad Trips On Scary Journeys

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